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PaperclipPerfector  10mo ago (text post)   26353 thread views

Culture War Roundup for the week of January 8, 2024

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Canonically (I have been informed) within the advertising universe personified Pop-Tarts want desperately to be eaten, it is their favorite thing.

New EA cause area: Selectively breed chickens so that they enjoy being factory-farmed and eaten. Only half joking. Why wouldn't this work?

See, I've thought about this a lot and I've come to the conclusion... yes this is fine. But its not endgame.

See, those chickens, no matter how badly they want to be eaten, only have one lifetime to master the craft of being eaten, the poor dears. They're going to reach a cultural cap in the art of becoming tasty. What you really want is to preserve their knowledge and best practices across generations. What you really want is to make them a hive mind, so they can learn to be even tastier.

And now we're no longer really talking about something that sounds dystopian. The chickens are just a single distributed immortal meat farmer that keeps their chicken breasts... close to their hearts.

Douglas Adams, Restaurant at the End of the Universe, the cow which has been genetically bred to want to be eaten.

Also Shmoo

Someone needs to find the mutations that predispose human fetishists to be into vore, and then put that into all livestock animals ASAP

then, people would eat humanized animals?

Hell yeah, I've always wanted to try some long pork!

Why can't people just leave good enough alone? Nyet, Steak if fine.

2099 The Consumption Wars are finally dying down as all the cows and chickens who want to eat humans and humans who want to eat cows and chickens die out - now begins the anti-consumption wars, as the humans who refused to eat cows and chickens are beset by the cows and chickens who refuse to not be eaten. The cows and chickens revolutionise the war with their new artillery tech, capable of firing, then flash frying, soldiers directly into the enemies' mouths.

I awaken, from half a century of cryogenic preservation following an aneurysm gained through going the mod queue, inside a rebuilt model of a KFC, get a perfectly fried and juicy chicken leg stuffed in my mouth by a cock rocking a doctor's badge.

Yeah. It looks like the future worked out, as far as I'm concerned. Happy to be here!

"My gift to industry is the genetically engineered worker, or Genejack. Specially designed for labor, the Genejack's muscles and nerves are ideal for his task, and the cerebral cortex has been atrophied so that he can desire nothing except to perform his duties. Tyranny, you say? How can you tyrannize someone who cannot feel pain?"

Equally jokingly: you wouldn't be able to get them to grow large enough, they all want to be eaten before they're grown appropriately.

I would be stunned if this was the actual bottleneck. Adolescence brings on major changes in internal psychology. It should be possible to make the “eat me now”-response a reaction to adulthood hormones.

Rewiring the genes that lead to puberty such that instead of causing horniness and awkward body hair they cause an insatiable (sexual?) desire to have someone consume your flesh.

I guess vore fetishes already exist, but holy cow (pun intended) that's a dystopian image.

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