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PaperclipPerfector  1yr ago (text post)   32315 thread views

Culture War Roundup for the week of July 17, 2023

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Bigfoots/Yeti are clearly the giants of the Bible, and the Smithsonian has a giant-finding operation which covers up their North American archaeological evidence. It was the Bigfoots of Michigan who provided king Solomon with his copper, in trade for gold, and it’s that gold which the Smithsonian is after. The Mormons were supposed to reveal them as the rightful rulers of America, which is why Mormons have been so vigorously persecuted.

That implies that angels are very hairy and apelike if the nephilim are giant ape-people. So ancient women had sex with angelic apes?

But then I suppose that's not much worse than ancient women being impregnated by four-headed bull angels or on-fire radioactive angels or concentric stone rings covered in eyes.

Technically speaking, angels assume whatever physical form they want because they don’t have bodies.

They don’t ever since Christianity got Greek philosophy’d, but the authors of the Hebrew Bible itself seemed to have believed angels, gods, and even Yahweh himself were actual physical beings that more or less functioned like humans, but bigger and stronger.

I was thinking more about Goliath and the other sons of Anak. Imagine young David facing a classic Bigfoot, but with his body hair ceremonially braided, covered in armor a regular man couldn’t hope to pick up, let alone wear.

If I were to make a Noah movie, I’d have the pre-flood giants be 8-ft-tall superheroes, with most of the usual powers except flight.

FWIW, copies of Samuel from the Dead Sea Scrolls, as well as the Septuagint (ancient Greek translation of yhe OT) have Golaith's height 2 cubits shorter than the Masoretic Text (which most older translations of the Old Testament are based on). So at least according to those, Goliath was about 6' 9".

Smithsonian, you’ve done it again! Dr. Jones should never have given them the Dial of Destiny.

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