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Notes -
Why no co-sleep? Suffocation or too dependent of a child? Any suggestion on a good carrier? Everyone around here is all about Baby Bjorn... $239.99, that is a plate carrier...
Co-sleeping isn't recommended in the US but I live in Japan and it's not particularly dispreferred here, and we co-slept with our first boy. Our bed was very big and I am an extremely light sleeper--I was especially then. We had light coverings and never any problems. We did have a crib for him, however, on many nights, and wrapped him up tight. You want to avoid him rolling over and getting all caught up in the pillows and quilts and whatever. That isn't good. The "too dependent" thing I really don't get and have never heard of, but I understand the idea of suffocation, especially if the parent is a heavy sleeper. I woke at the slightest peep in those days.
My advice is mostly for the mom: Sleep when the baby sleeps if at all possible. And for dad: Get shit done that mom is too tired to do. I was a dishwasher, cook, cleaner, carrier-around of crying baby, coo-er of sweet nothings, singer, feeder, diaper-changer, baby-bather, formula-giver. About the only thing I didn't do was breastfeed. Even then I felt like my wife did most of the figurative hard-lifting as I was at work most of the day. Also re: baby bathing: When the child is young you have no choice but to hold him/ her in whatever the bath. As they grow, the temptation might be to leave them for a second if you have something you need to do-- a door needs closing, phone answering, etc. Do not do it. Do not leave the child alone. I had a close call once when I walked out of the room for literally ten seconds and when I came back my youngest son was submerged in water. Not good. He hadn't been under more than a second, but it was enough to make me feel like I had dodged a very, very bad thing.
Finally, limit or avoid wifey's exposure to phthalates, which has been called "The Everywhere Chemical."
The following from Public Health and Preventative Medicine Boulton & Wallace, 2022:
If you're going to give advice like that, maybe add a few hints on how to avoid something called "The Everywhere Chemical"...
Fair call. From the link I posted:
The most common products using phthalate compounds are:
The article has diagrams and goes on a bit more but I am on mobile and pasting from that PDF already was tedious to reformat.
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Re: co-sleep, both.
As far as baby carriers, the one we ended using was a gift, but I'm pretty sure this is it.
I don't know about recommendations, but it (along with a couple molle pouches) did the job, and maybe we just got lucky with both of our kids having reasonably chill attitudes as infants but "wear the carrier and just continue your" life turned out to be a pretty workable plan.
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