The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
-
Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
-
Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.
-
Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.
-
Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Notes -
I have lifestyle issues more than just depression where your brain fucks with you. If with a snap of my fingers, I got all the technical know how and a steday source of money, some progress on my startup stuff, I would instantly be happy so just ssris wont fix this. I will just start small for now, keep stacking things on my routine.
I was making progress in life when I had a routine so that is a good place to start. Will read Jordan Peterson and implement some stuff he recommends as a starting point to make sure I am taking some action in life. Cleaning your room, having a routine, tracking stuff you do daily, meditating, avoiding screens (surfing in particular), working out, getting enough rest etc should help me feel better in a weeks time.
Seconding @TheDag on this. It's very common for people to say "if only I had X I would be happy", get the thing, and then find out that they still aren't happy. Happiness really is a function of mindset more than external circumstances.
One thing you can try to work on to increase happiness is to try practicing gratitude. Focus as much as you can on the good side of things rather than the bad, and consciously make an effort to be grateful for those good things. At first it will be hard and require a conscious effort, but with practice it will get easier as your mind forms the habit. And eventually, it will help with your overall happiness as you are able to appreciate your current life situation more, no matter what it is.
Gratitude stuff never worked for me tbh. I resonated much more with allowing myself to feel whatever emotion I was feeling
With gratitude I always ended up beating myself up for not feeling it hah.
More options
Context Copy link
This is true, yet I am only happy when I am progressing in life. Right now, being skillless and pennyless hurts me a lot, it wont make me super happy or grateful like meditation does but at least then I can not be sad and have something to work on. Obviously I need to feel better to even start working but I will feel way better, maybe not happier but at least I will not hate myself. I will feel like a grown up, feel like I am actually 24 instead of 14 in many ways.
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
I don't mean to be cruel, but I don't think this is true my friend. In my experience these sorts of external things often do not make for true happiness. It takes a change in the way you process the world and your relationships.
Peterson is a good place to start, I agree. Good luck.
Sure but the removal of bad life decisions would at least make me not unhappy. I cannot be happy if my life is falling apart which it has. I am ambitious so not having the skills to match that is not a fun way to live.
How is your life falling apart man? It seems to me like you're going through the normal struggles of a young adult.
I feels like hell to me but maybe it's not as unique or intense of an experience. Regardless it's not that bad, I visited a psychiatrist today and every single patient here had worse issues than me, permanent ones that make life unlivable in ways. I'm very thankful, I can't imagine the pain many of these people and their parents go through.
Have you tried SSRIs? They really helped me out of a low spot. I was against them for a long time but glad I changed my mind.
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link