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PaperclipPerfector  1yr ago (text post)   25087 thread views

Culture War Roundup for the week of October 16, 2023

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I honestly don't care if it sounds patriarchal or not. I'm not a modern progessive (though I'm not exactly conservative or traditional either) and the things I care about are not based on what sounds patriarchal or not. Consent is not the only moral value that matters in sex and sometimes you do have a responsibility to not enable people to make bad decisions, and especially not to take advantage of their propensity to make bad decisions for your own benefit. That's true when a man does it to a woman, when a woman does it to a man or any other combination of genders.

But what makes 'having sex while drunk' a bad decision, per se? Me and one other person in this thread met our wives this way -- it happens a lot. My experience with alcohol is not so much that people do things that they don't want to do when sober as that they do things that they'd like to, but are too inhibited for whatever reasons. Sure sometimes these inhibitions are in some way 'correct', but there's not really a bright line there that I can see. (other than of course if somebody is actually passed out or otherwise physically incapable of articulating consent or lack thereof -- which most people are comfortable just calling 'rape' without any beating about the bush around 'bad decisions' or 'impaired judgement'.

I certainly wouldn't say that having sex while drunk is always a bad decision, but certainly sometimes it's a bad decision. In my experience, it is plenty common that people make bad decisions while drunk. I'm not sure whether those bad decisions are "things that they'd like to do, but are too inhibited for whatever reasons" but I do think they are things the person involved regrets.

something something 'a life without regrets is not worth living'?

ed: It's also very possible to regret not having sex when you were drunk -- it's not really possible to know ahead of time. 'Zero risk tolerance' is not a life-strategy I'd advise.

It's also very possible to regret not having sex when you were drunk

This is a fair point and one that I don't think I ever stated any disagreement with. Sometimes sex while drunk is a good idea and sometimes it's not is not an exciting conclusion but it's probably true.

+1 for met his wife while both were almost too drunk to walk.

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