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Notes -
Have you... have you been friendzoned forever?
No lol, I have slept with women and I can sleep with them. I just do not hit on ones who are like my mom, very traditional, I do not do it because I like being friend-zoned lol, on the contrary, I am somewhat decent at pickup, I just share a bond with this girl because she is religious and I do not want to be someone who sleeps with her.
I friend-zoned her and a few other traditional conservative girls the first time we interacted because I know how much sleeping with a guy impacts them, that is just how some feel in my religion. Sleeping with girls who are really chaste is something I see as a sin, maybe I am weird. I do not have issues with those who sleep around, I just only sleep with them and not ones who are chaste.
My oneitis is a different girl altogether and even she had not friend-zoned me but I did fuck up big time with her.
Uh... username does not seem to check out, but good for you I guess.
My username is about me being realistic in the short term, and delusional in the long term, A friend started calling me a practical romantic since that day.
I actually do not even believe in romance at all and do not think have ever even been on a date the way most people do them, usually just have sex the night or day of and that is about it. I do not even believe in romantic love or soulmates being real (find the second thing very cringey).
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I have despised the term one-itis since I first saw it used some ten or more years ago. I don't hate it less now. You use the term regularly in your posts, referring presumably to the same woman each time. I think sloughing this off is something you need to seriously consider doing. Not the term. The feeling, the tacit acceptance of it as an unavoidable part of your character, your life, your affection. Alternately, if you are intent on embracing this woman as your one-and-only, distance yourself from it so that there is no such thing as a fuckup, there is just life, with her in it however she is in it, without some ulterior motive on your part to get in her pants--and where your failure at this results in some existential crisis. Nothing but madness lies that way. Be true to your username. You'll find a certain weight is lifted.
Totally, my main priority is fixing my life, being a good programmer, and making money and my lack of skills plus being in my town makes me hate meeting good women, I am certain that I will move out soon in a year or less to a metropolis and meet better women but until then my brain refuses to change. I need to fix my skill deficit and move out, I will get over her.
I detailed the entire saga on themotte subreddit and it was painful, I wish to get over her soon. I want nothing to do with her, I wish her well but I want out of this misery, need to sleep with hotties frequently but that is a few months away.
I know this is supposed to be a "fun thread* so I won't sully the well, but you don't need, with me at least, to use terms like "better women" or "hotties." You seem to be pushing (flogging) yourself forward and perhaps that will build your confidence.
fair enough, also I am surprised that the term oneitis was around 10 years ago.
Also I do agree with your broad sentiment, apologies if I made the post too serious.
I first saw the term in Neil Strauss's The Game (2011) which arguably popularized the idea of being a PUA, though apparently it predates even that.
Edit ' wrong date
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Pretty much. It's at the very least a strong L if he had any romantic aspirations whatsoever.
I did not, I friend-zoned her as as soon as I met her as I do not sleep with traditional women and never wanted to sleep with her, I meet women and am decent at pickup lol.
Respect. It's hard enough for traditional women to keep it in their pants nowadays, every little bit helps.
Finally, someone gets it. I have had girl issues but that was just one girl and I learnt how to talk to girls after that. I would feel bad sleeping with a girl who is really chaste and thinking of me as some marriage material which is what happens with them.
I am a religious man, not the most religious but this would be sinful of me.
Do you never get an urge to pick up some delicate and pristine artifact of purity and beauty and smash it to bits, grind it into dust, stomp it into mud with your feet, debase the very idea it represents?
Not unless it's an artifact representing an idea I hate, no.
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No because I like my mother. She was this way when she was young so I can't do it.
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