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PaperclipPerfector  1yr ago (text post)   31872 thread views

Culture War Roundup for the week of July 10, 2023

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My ideal system: applicants strip naked, anoint themselves with oil, then are dropped together innawoods with nothing but a knife. The goal is to reach a pickup point a hundred miles away where 100 of them will be randomly selected to go on to stage 2. This will require them to work together while having a plan to betray their comrades, which is important for elite. Them being naked encourages looksism in their alliances, which is a good thing because the elite should be beautiful, solid, supple, tight, and golden skinned.

For stage 2 they are immediately driven over to the Mr Olympia stage and pose in front of 5000 people next to actual contestanfs. This will test their bullshitting and out-angling skills, which are the most important elite skills (have to look like the bigger guy in the hand shake photo ops).

For stage 2 they are immediately driven over to the Mr Olympia stage and pose in front of 5000 people next to actual contestanfs. This will test their bullshitting and out-angling skills, which are the most important elite skills (have to look like the bigger guy in the hand shake photo ops)

Only if they’re driven over naked, with the blood of the slain still caked on their skin.

They must ritually boil and extract the fat from the adipose tissue of the fallen, and then lather it over themselves.

That's showing that they can shine, above and beyond the process of victory against all odds.

And what better way to shine than be positively radiant; to bathe in the blubber of the fallen, then setting themselves alight? Enduring that surely shows strength of character.

This made me laugh out loud on the train, thanks. We could do with more humor here.

I'm doing my part!

Come on you apes, you wanna live forever?!

This ape does, but I'm from Buenos Aires and I say kill them all first!

Lmao how'd I know? ;P

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