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Because people 'blowing up their life with porn' doesn't look like what you think it looks like.
It's not telegenic, interesting, doesn't get into the crime blotter, it's just sad and boring. Quite often they don't have a life to blow up in the first place. You think you have any reason to know or be friends with guys who apart from work spend 2-3 hours daily on porn? You think you can tell which guy at work has little drive because his reward system is completely screwed from superstimuli ?
For some unclear reason, serious porn use makes men even less sociable than can be ascribed to their solitary 'hobby'.
Have you counted the amount of men you encounter who fit that pattern, and compared it to how it was before mass internet ?
You do know people are more solitary and friendless today than ever before, right ?
You are aware of 'survivorship bias' right ?
Are we really supposed to think you'd be perfectly okay with your wife neglecting ..everything else and locking herself away for 60-90 minutes daily to masturbate over things that you are scared to contemplate as 'no biggie', right ?
60-90 minutes!? That's a crazy amount of time just to rub one out.
I don't suppose you've heard of "edging"?
Yes, and 'gooning' as well, but it still seems like a lot of time.
"I take a shower and open up at least 30 tabs of Overwatch SFM porn and edge for at least 2 hours until I feel better." This example comes from a woman, too, though whether you think it actually happen(s/ed) is up to debate.
My impression was that women generally do longer sessions less frequently and men do short sessions more frequently. But of course this isn't a subject I discuss with many people so my sample size is admittedly very small.
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Really? 90 minutes would be a disappointingly short session for me. Mine are closer to 7-11 hours but only every other week. But I don't feel like my life is particularly 'blown up'. Surely, it's not that big of a time commitment compared to a relationship? I still have time for university, parties, and other hobbies. I do, however, regret that the dopamine frenzy could have been used for more productive ends, like a programming project.
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I think the point is that someone who is truly addicted to porn isn't just rubbing one out. They are compulsively watching porn, not just having a quick orgasm and moving on with life.
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If you're on SSRIs it's not unusual.
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Then logically it follows that "just rubbing one out" isn't what they're doing.
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