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Small-Scale Question Sunday for June 4, 2023

Do you have a dumb question that you're kind of embarrassed to ask in the main thread? Is there something you're just not sure about?

This is your opportunity to ask questions. No question too simple or too silly.

Culture war topics are accepted, and proposals for a better intro post are appreciated.

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I’m confused about what you’re saying. Are you saying that your league is so low you can’t find any women in it you wouldn’t feel predatory trying to date? Might I suggest ozempic, a job, and a shower if that’s the case?

Or are you saying you’re looking for someone minimally functional and not morbidly obese, but poor and not particularly cute? Just import one from Ukraine or Argentina or date single moms off plenty of fish.

I read this in the overall comment feed and immediately knew whom you were replying to.

I’m saying yes, my league is so low that I can’t find any women in it I wouldn’t feel predatory trying to date. As for Ozempic, job, and shower: I’m a grad student, decently fashionable. Far from the unshaven, smelly, fat guy you envision. 5’6” and 160 pounds; while I’m no slouch in the weight room, I could stand to lose 10 to 15 pounds.

If I looked like Danny DeVito and worked as an engineer, and had none of his acting talent, would you say the same? Sure, he could lose weight, but he’s still short and ugly. Imagine who autistic Danny DeVito’s league is, hydroacetylene.

How much is losing your virginity worth to you? A plane ticket?

I had thought you were self describing as 400 lbs with poor hygiene. You don’t actually sound that low, just kind of short(but taller than the average woman! And you can just lie about your height, wear cowboy boots, and date short women- they don’t care very much as long as you’re taller than them) and maybe with bad social skills(have you tried improving them? You can probably find adult social skills classes by dealing with a therapist, yes I know therapy is cringe) and an unfortunate face(is it something different facial hair can fix?).

In reality women care a lot less about what you look like than you’d think. Try dating Asian women or overweight but not landwhale single moms- both less picky than average if you’re white.

If all else fails there’s a lot of single women who really, really want to get out of Ukraine right now.

Dude. I'm okay with morbid obesity as long as she's capable of basic hygiene. Even that is potentially negotiable as long as I can do it ethically. That's basically my league right now bro.

I don’t see what’s so unethical about dating a fat woman three social classes below you?

Sex is illegal in American culture. There's probably someone in Skookum's life that will shame him for trying, whoever he tries to talk to, however he tries to talk to her. You can go anywhere in America and still find the same pattern. Maybe these rules only apply to a certain class of men, but they apply across all English-speaking subcultures.

Fortunately, there are other places for us to live.

Nothing - as long as she is capable of doing basic hygiene. You might have power-differential issues if she’s bedbound and needs her butt wiped.

No one is suggesting you date severely disabled people, mental patients, or women who are in and out of prison. But most fat single moms are not that.

Literally just have no standards on plenty of fish or some other bottom of the barrel dating site. That seem to be what you want to do, so why are you agonizing about it? Make like a kid in an Indonesian sneaker factory and just do it.

Haven't tried plenty of fish.

I don't see any ethical issues at all if she is able to work a job, any job, and live independently. If the fat single mom is working a job at McDonald's, isn't shooting up heroin, and hasn't stabbed anyone or gotten them thrown in jail she is a catch.

Like. My goals/standards are, in this order:

  1. don't be a predator or evil

  2. date someone

  3. stay aboveground and out of hospitals and jails

Those seem reasonable, no? Or is even that fairly modest seeming goal unrealistic?

And based off your self description this seems pretty doable? Have you considered actually trying to date the women you say are out of your league?