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naraburns  nihil supernum  1yr ago (text post)   35038 thread views

Culture War Roundup for the week of March 6, 2023

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Eg, if my male friend confesses he's gay and proposes to have sex with me, it's going to make the friendship weird for a while to say the least, but shunning him and telling everyone he's a piece of shit? Unjustified.

Sure, because a straight guy being propositioned by gay friend is embarassing for both parties. Even if you shunned him you wouldn't want to tell anyone about it because doing so would harm you as much as him. The same doesn't apply with men and women.

Turning down gay sex doesn't harm you, you should absolutely let women you want to sleep with find out - an open invitation to have sex makes you more sexually desirable through peer pressure and fomo mechanics, even from a gay guy to a straight guy. You might take a hit to your status with guys, but not much of one these days.

I've heard from some women that a bi man or a straight man who has had sex with men is less attractive to them than one who hasn't had sex with men, all else being equal. Obviously the opposite tends not to be true for women who've had sex with women. A gay man propositioning you is obviously different from having sex with you, but I wonder if there would be some effect here in the same direction. I never delved deeply into why these women felt this way about men who had sex with men, so I have little clue on the underlying mechanism.

Maybe in more traditional and conservative cultures, but in my experience in typical modern liberal environments it just raises your status.

I have gotten the same impression from women about bi guys though. Some of them are fine with it, but many seem like they put bi guys below gay guys in the list of dating prospects. My cousin said she felt betrayed when her boyfriend told her he was bi, which I kind of get. They stayed together for a few more months though.

Presumably that since it's easier to have gay sex than seducing women, men who chose to have gay sex over seducing women did so out of desperation.

Conversely, women are more attracted to men who have a history of seducing women.

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