The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
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Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
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Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.
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Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.
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Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).
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How much time do you spend each week on social engagements? And does that differ from the amount you'd like to be spending?
I've had some weeks recently where I was asked to do something on every day of the week. I work full time, and I have various solitary hobbies that I'd like to spend more time pursuing; and so weeks like that feel far, far too busy for my optimal happiness. At times like that, I wish I could have an entire week all to myself with no disturbances. But I don't think that would make me happy either.
Recently I was talking with a friend of mine about the "optimal number of friends who you see often." I think I concluded that it would be no more than two or three.
I have a family and I see them all the time, but otherwise I feel like one social engagement a week is a good rate for me. But the optimal number of friends to maintain for that one social engagement feels like it's around 6-8 people.
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I see one of my good friends once a week, my girlfriend 3-4 times a week, and other friends/acquaintances once a month or so. I also see my family and brothers every couple of weeks and random parties every now and then. Many of my best friends have moved away and I try to see them once or twice a year.
I wish I had one or two more close friends nearby who I could see on a weekly basis. My sweet spot would be hanging with my friends maybe two to three days a week, my girlfriend a couple times a week, and alone time a couple days a week. I like reading and other hobbies that I do solo, so seven nights a week of social time would be too much. That’s some Teddy Roosevelt level of socializing that I could not handle.
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