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Notes -
That's a good point regarding drugs. I don't know how much of a mess I might seem to others though. She died on saturday. I was back to work on monday, and I'm only planning on taking time off in so much as it would help for administrative tasks that result from her death. I loved my mother a lot, but I feel no impairment, no need to take a breather. Maybe it's a family trait, neither of my parents families are very performatively emotional. Within hours of it happening, my brother and I were calmly and casually discussing the logistics of the funeral, inheritance, etc... The only moments when I get choked up thinking about it is when I put myself into some else's shoes. Maybe it's also having internalized enough stoic philosophy that dampened my emotions. I don't know.
I think your reaction is pretty normal. When my dad died my family focused on logistics of internment, and my primary task was sorting out where he was on the taxes and getting an estimated return filed (it was close to the regular filing due date). I got 3 work days bereavement and while I used them all, it was mostly because of travel to/from my folks house. I expect it'll be similar when my mom dies.
On the other hand, I think if my husband pre-deceased me, I would need more than 3 days to figure out how to manage. And if my daughter pre-deceased me I am not sure I would ever really be functional again. I wonder if my dad had died while I still lived in his home if I would have been less emotionally pragmatic than I was.
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