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PaperclipPerfector  3mo ago (text post)   4233 thread views

Small-Scale Question Sunday for July 7, 2024

Do you have a dumb question that you're kind of embarrassed to ask in the main thread? Is there something you're just not sure about?

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what is that like?

It's a mixed bag, overall I slightly prefer my home country (the US).

What prompted the move?

My wife is native to this country and we wanted to raise our kids bilingual/bicultural.

What have been the biggest challenges?

It's crazy expensive to pay for an overseas family move without moving assistance from the military, your company, etc. I worked a contract job on top of my full time job for about a year to save up enough (my wife is a SAHM).
It's also pretty lonely sometimes. Living abroad is fun when you're young and single and have lots of free time, but as a married family man, it's mostly the same as living back home except I have to deal with laws and social customs that are hard for me to understand. And because I'm no longer a baby faced bright eyed 22 year old but a 30-something year old head of a household it's no longer "cute" when I get confused or make a mistake, so I get cut less slack.

What have been the greatest rewards?

Seeing my kids participate in culture events, festivals, learn traditional songs, become fluent with their own way of speaking in the local language, and more. I think we've done a good job getting them educated and well integrated into this society. Personally I feel like it has scratched my wife and my "I want to live overseas" itch so I can return to the US and not be tormented by what could have been. I've also developed a hobby of making a local alcoholic drinks and pickled vegetables. And gardening, although I guess I could've done that anywhere.

Anything which was surprising to you, that you never would have thought to even consider before making the move?

Many small things, but one major one that stands out is how accepting people have been of me and my half-foreign family despite this country famously being "closed" socially (and having been "closed" historically in a much more literal sense). Local people don't treat me like a tourist because tourists almost never come out here, so I think they assume that I belong here even if they don't know me. It also helps that I have kids in the local school system.

Thanks! I'm guessing from the talk about closure that you are living in Japan?

Yep, living in rural Japan.

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