site banner
PaperclipPerfector  8mo ago (text post)   2994 thread views

Wellness Wednesday for March 20, 2024

The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:

  • Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.

  • Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.

  • Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.

  • Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).

3
Top Bottom Old Controversial Comments
Jump in the discussion.

No email address required.

Congratulations on your upcoming nuptials! It'll be the adventure of a lifetime, enjoy the ride!

Thank you! It's strange that while I'm excited to be married, I'm not particularly excited about the wedding. In part because of all of my ideas basically got shut down, but also the realization it's so incredibly performative that I feel like the vast majority of it is farcical. I might get a rice cooker and a new bed out of it so that's worth it, right?

I was blessed to have a wife who also didn't really want to do the whole wedding thing, and we got away with having immediate family only, 12 people total.

I reasoned that I hated every other wedding I went to, so why would I want to waste my money on one.

I might get a rice cooker and a new bed out of it so that's worth it, right?

If it's a really good rice cooker then YesChad.jpg.

Bro the wedding itself was absolute ass honestly. My wife and I both hate being the center of attention and that entire day you are the center of attention and there are so many expectations of you particularly if you come from a non-western family like I do.

Dealing with venues and vendors, who to invite, seat placements, etc. was fucking painful. Not to mention the money involved.

So it’s not weird at all that you’re excited for the marriage part instead of the wedding.

Congrats though, I’m not trying to be pessimistic just saying I feel your pain :)

What is this place?

This website is a place for people who want to move past shady thinking and test their ideas in a court of people who don't all share the same biases. Our goal is to optimize for light, not heat; this is a group effort, and all commentators are asked to do their part.

The weekly Culture War threads host the most controversial topics and are the most visible aspect of The Motte. However, many other topics are appropriate here. We encourage people to post anything related to science, politics, or philosophy; if in doubt, post!

Check out The Vault for an archive of old quality posts. You are encouraged to crosspost these elsewhere.


Why are you called The Motte?

A motte is a stone keep on a raised earthwork common in early medieval fortifications. More pertinently, it's an element in a rhetorical move called a "Motte-and-Bailey", originally identified by philosopher Nicholas Shackel. It describes the tendency in discourse for people to move from a controversial but high value claim to a defensible but less exciting one upon any resistance to the former. He likens this to the medieval fortification, where a desirable land (the bailey) is abandoned when in danger for the more easily defended motte. In Shackel's words, "The Motte represents the defensible but undesired propositions to which one retreats when hard pressed."

On The Motte, always attempt to remain inside your defensible territory, even if you are not being pressed.


New post guidelines

If you're posting something that isn't related to the culture war, we encourage you to post a thread for it. A submission statement is highly appreciated, but isn't necessary for text posts or links to largely-text posts such as blogs or news articles; if we're unsure of the value of your post, we might remove it until you add a submission statement. A submission statement is required for non-text sources (videos, podcasts, images).

Culture war posts go in the culture war thread; all links must either include a submission statement or significant commentary. Bare links without those will be removed.

If in doubt, please post it!


Rules


Recommended Posts And Communities

Recommended Realtime Chats