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Servers making $20 - $50 an hour is so rare I have never met a server IRL who has made that money consistently and instead on a handful of holidays throughout the year. Tips, in my opinion, are compliments by customers to their servers, not gambling percentages meant to help owners from paying livable wages. It creates a hostile relationship between the customer and the server.
Working for a bad boss is inevitable, I agree, but I believe living in a state with strong labor laws gives you more options to respond to that than what I found here, which is "suck it up" or "quit and get no unemployment". It prevents bad managers and owners from ruining their own businesses with high turnover rates - and therefore ruining the income of multiple people - by having laws that protect employees in hostile work environments.
I'm glad you were able to find help easily. It's not the same for others in my experience.
There is generally a high cost in my opinion as someone who has lived in 4 states. The only reason my family was able to move was because my father had a high-paying career that allowed us to rent out all the necessary services to successfully move a family. I am considering in having children what my freedoms are in terms of movement. What if a state passes hostile laws that force me to relocate?
There is no way to confirm, yes, and there will always be something to get in order, but there are fundamental problems with patience, kindness and positivity that are a result of growing up with incredibly negative and angry parents who constantly fought because their social conservatism told them women were children, men were rapists, marriage counselors were quacks and divorce was admitting weakness. I definitely have checkpoints I intend to reach in emotional maturity before I deal with the emotions of another person, much less my children.
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