The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
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Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
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Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.
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Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.
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Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).
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I am a man and I have extensive firsthand experience in this department. Me, I'm a simple vegetarian (which means I eat dairy and eggs) and only qualify for "disordered eating," which is to say that my eating habits are not even in the zip code of normal people but don't rise to the level of a full-blown eating disorder--autism, it's what's (not) for breakfast! My wife, on the other hand, has struggled with anorexia for most of her adult life and was 58 pounds at her lowest weight. There's no delicate way for me to say this, but the, "you don't want me to get fat, right," comment, her restrictive diet, and being underweight all combine to raise my suspicions that your girlfriend is anorexic. In fact, that's pretty much the diagnostic criteria for anorexia right there if we assume that the fear of becoming overweight is intense or otherwise exaggerated. If she is, there are other common signs that you've already noticed or will notice over time, things like being extremely self-conscious about her body, a negative self-image in general, hiding her body with loose clothing or layers, a general habit of withdrawing and isolating from friends and fun/enjoyable activities, fluid loading, especially with caffeinated beverages, noticeably low muscle mass on arms and legs, etc.
I actually came here to write about my own difficulties in my marriage due in major part to my wife's anorexia and I have been crying off and on as I write this because this shit is as serious as a heart attack and I want to find a way to convey this to you. Recovery is possible but it's a long and arduous road, requiring a good treatment team, a support network that unabashedly loves her and supports her unconditionally, and most importantly her own willingness to participate in treatment and sustained efforts to recover. Please feel free to respond/DM me if you want to talk more about this--I hope like hell that it isn't that bad, and I wish you well regardless.
The fuck, that's Auschwitz-grade weight. I hope your wife can make peace with her body.
Yeah, she was institutionalized for that, I'm sure it saved her life. Sadly, she's still anorexic af, but she's managed a balance where she maintains a decent weight, so she's got that going for her.
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