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Notes -
This is a great post.
One of the problems adults seem to have is assuming that kids have no agency in their interpretation of their instructions from adults. One of the classic examples is the Participation Trophy, widely decried for making kids think they did something when they didn't. I grew up at peak participation trophy, I have a box of them somewhere or other. Little marble bases with little plastic baseball players on top, given to me for playing first base on a winless team when I was nine years old or so. Most critics think that the problem is that kids will think they achieved something that they didn't, and maybe some did, but all I got was a distaste for trophies in general. I had some trophies, they weren't interesting, why worry about them?
On the other hand, when I was 12, and my little league team went 18-0 and made it to regional playoffs, and one of the parents had little pullover windbreakers made for that team, I valued that jacket greatly. I still have it, somewhere. Achievement is an objective fact, strength is an objective fact, beauty is an objective fact. Attempts to hide the ball will simply create new instances of Euphemism Treadmills.
In the same way, I think a lot of what is getting criticized as childishness by Freddie is in reality a warped view of maturity inflicted on kids. Being quiet, being compliant, being unobtrusive, are all traits that are valued and rewarded in children. Then we find ourselves with adults who grew up that way and wonder what happened.
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