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Culture War Roundup for the week of September 30, 2024

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Former Frat Bro here.

I never saw it happen, never heard about it happening, never heard about guys wanting to do it even in a joking way. I graduated well before MeToo etc. happened but, even back then, we would have pre-party "briefings" where we reminded everyone that if a girl started to slur, wobble etc. To point her out to one of the designated sober brothers to get her off the property and, if necessary, call medical services etc.

It was a liability thing. Liability in the insurance sense (if someone gets over-served at your frat house and hurts themselves, it can actually be kind of a grey area), but also - moreso - in the reputational sense. We didn't want to be the House that girls saw as "the House where you always somehow leave really fucked up." That's an awful reputation to have. We, the brothers, definitely got shitty on the regular (to much rejoicing) but we never liked girls showing up plastered and certainly not getting plastered in the house. In fact, we didn't really like non-brothers non-friends-of-the-frat getting wasted because we couldn't predict their behavior.

I'll be the first to admit that Frat dudes do a lot of dumb stuff - but it's mostly very obvious, juvenile dumb stuff. Most Frat antics are like the early seasons of Jackass. Most of the hard drinking results in passing out on a couch. The sometimes reputation of Frats as these complex networks of coordinated sexual assault is pure fiction.


Because I can't resist a good story in this context - One time, we had a mixer with one of the sororities. This was known as the "Hot" sorority, so we all tried to look good and stay on our best behavior. While pleasant, they definitely were not "passing the vibe check." As time passes, there is much checking of the watches and dwindling of conversation. Our social chair - who earned that motherfucking title - is suddenly on his flip phone (yeah) in the corner dialing up half his phone book. He gives me an assured nod. 20 minutes later, about 15 ladies from a different sorority show up. Cue record scratch, cue "uh oh spaghetti ohs". Queen Bee A and Queen Bee B exchange some awkardness, mumbles about this being an "exclusive mixer" echo through the crowd. Social Chair (fucking earned it) announces "settle it with beer pong!"

3 straight hours of sorority on sorority combative beer pong. 2 dozen frat dudes ripping shots and heaters taking bets round by round. The winning team at the end of the night puked the champion's puke, the losers walked in soggy wedge heels home, stomachs intact but hearts empty.

God bless you, Craig.