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Because it helps them work towards something. Same reason young guys might join gangs, even though the ends of such a group are antisocial, because it feels like a purposeful life. Controlling territory, feuding with rivals, terrorizing the countryside. We can't easily separate the male from his violent nature, but we can prevent it from falling into destructive patterns.
Kids intrinsically provide you with purpose, once you're 'saddled' with the responsibility of protecting these hapless, defenseless little humans from a fairly dangerous world. And in most cases you DON'T need to enact violence to keep your own kids safe (although if the need arises, you better have prepared for it, you won't pull John Wick skills out of your ass), but having CONFIDENCE in yourself, being able to stare down any problem without flinching, and defending your family from those that would harm it requires one HELL of an ironclad mindset, which I daresay most flabby 'soyboys' simply aren't able to cultivate.
Some people develop that motivation after the kids, but in my mind the capacities should be developed as part of becoming a worthy partner, and being able to demonstrate the 'value' to a mate.
And so I want to build up men who are capable of violence, but also capable of controlling it, reining it in, and deploying it only where necessary. And once that's done, you've got a male who is more secure in their ability to operate in society because he does not cower due to the everpresent risk of physical confrontation. And THAT is the sort of guy who is 'worthy' of finding a high value woman.
And I want to give those guys a PURPOSE to pursue. I do not want to loose a cadre of violence-trained men on a world without direction, goals, or purpose. But there are exceedingly few purposes that are going to appeal to such men other than those inbuilt instincts to procreate, build a family, and defending a homestead.
The male urge to be violent works to get them hyped up to go and kill the hated enemy in military operations, especially if you tell him he can plunder wealth in the process. On the homefront, you also have to appeal to his instincts to protect his family, his kin, his property, and give him enough direction that he doesn't HAVE to go around killing to assert his masculinity.
Or if you like, you have to balance the Testosterone with Oxytocin.
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