ser
8d ago
For somebody who has that extreme level of risk aversion, what options are there that beat a HYSA? Browbeating her into equities isn't going to fly.
There's really not much if you want a hands off experience. If you live in a state with income tax, perhaps look into municipal bonds that offer tax exemption, that's about it.
I have experience with slowly convincing my father from only ever investing into real estate and never using a credit card to having around 25% of his networth in equities and putting everything through 2% credit card. It took a few years, but you just gotta be persistent. Combination of him seeing me do well with equities and seeing non stop SPX ATHs on the news did their thing over time. He started off with a $10k investment and once he saw the green numbers, it was easier to convince him to put in more. You really just gotta have her start and the green numbers will do the rest. Monkey brain loves seeing green number.
I don't use credit cards outside of the bare minimum necessary to keep them active.
I really don't understand this aversion of credit cards from some people. Do you believe you're so bad at controlling yourself that you will spend more than you can afford if you use a credit card?
ser
8d ago
With condos specifically, look at HOA dues, reserves, info about special assessments (last time one was done, any plans to have one in the near future), and if HOA outsources management. I cannot stress this enough - HOA makes or breaks value of any condo. There's so many ways HOA could be mismanaged, from a few motivated boomers on the board strongarming to suppress monthly dues, which causes reserves to be insufficient a decade later, to hiring a 3rd party management company that charges you $80/hr any time you email HOA with a question or hires the most expensive person (because they get kickback) every time ANYTHING needs to be done. Once I've seen an owner have a huge legal battle with HOA - guess where the money comes from to pay those legal fees? Also look at renting rules, a lot of HOAs, especially the ones with a lot of boomers on the board, have rental caps (certain % of all units can be rented out at any time) - that affects the value significantly since a lot of people buy condos as an investment and it's a trash investment when you're beholden to HOA on whether you can rent out your own property.
ser
9d ago
All you gotta do is drop the habit for a few months, you'll definitely be able to feel it. I used to have consistently poor sleep for years and never fully felt like it was affecting me. Now, I've finally found a routine that works for me and I can feel the difference 1 night of poor sleep makes. You just get used to feeling shit everyday, it becomes the new normal pretty quick.
ser
9d ago
I definitely tasted the sugar but didn't connect 2 and 2 together because I was already set on thinking that it was sugar free version in the moment. Only noticed the label when I was throwing the bottles away. Don't drink soda enough to realize the only noticeable difference is bottle cap color.
ser
12d ago
One evening this week I drank 2 16oz bottles of regular sprite thinking it was sugar free version. Woke up the next day feeling like a train ran me over. Incredible how much of an impact something so minor has, genuinely felt sluggish the whole day.
ser
16d ago
As someone with social anxiety, weed gives me tachycardia and makes me extremely paranoid. I've tried different strengths and strains, the outcome is roughly the same more or less.
ser
19d ago
I grant myself one cheat day a week.
be careful. You can easily undo weeks worth of progress by one cheat day, especially if you're too harsh with your diet throughout the week, which would make your cravings stronger. You can consume whatever you want, the most important thing is your caloric intake/macros. I ate whatever I wanted when I was on a caloric deficit for 4 months, the 'bad' food was frontloaded at the start of the day so that it was easier for me to keep track. For example, if I wanted a piece of cake, I would eat in the morning and the rest of the meals would be a bit lower fat than usual since cake is high in fat. A little bit of foresight goes a long way.
I also suggest a 45-60 minute walk 2-3 times a week, it would speed up your results by 20-30%, not to mention all the other health benefits.
ser
20d ago
Or perhaps he's making that post because every night his mind is racing and stomach's turning because SNDK is down 40% and he's wondering if he should hop off the train now ha
I used to resell things on ebay. Product acquisition was mostly automated through bots, so packing and shipping out orders was the most time consuming thing, perhaps ~8 hours/week. Profits would vary a lot, but average would be around $2.5k per month. Pretty easy and brainless stuff, but often times inventory would sit for a few weeks/months taking up a lot of space, so it got annoying.
At this point, the obvious thing to do is to take some chips off the table, but the tricky part is that part of me thinks that AI is more than just a bubble, that it will have economic impacts which make the Internet seem like pet rocks, hula hoops, and Dutch tulip bulbs.
This can be true at the same time as your investment declining/underperforming. You're not betting purely on AI being more than just a bubble, you're betting on this specific list of companies continuing to benefit off this narrative. Realistically, you caught a huge chunk of the move already, missing another 2x from here may sting but if you exit now you're booking solid profits and the money you take off (minus taxes) can be distributed into other assets that will still continue appreciating.
In general, I think it's a good time to start taking some chips off the table when you start having urges to post something like this. $4m being slight majority of your portfolio, you must be worth around $7m? The volatility of AI stocks is insane, will you able to stomach 30-60% drawdowns? Has the idea of having this net worth set in as new baseline in your mind? Only you can answer these questions. If I was in this situation, I'd take off 50-60% here, put it in the bank for a month or two, get used to seeing this number. And only then start thinking what to do with it.
ser
29d ago
Given your circumstances, stop worrying about it until you get to college. When in college, get 2-3 female friends that you won't try to get romantically entangled with. Use them to learn how to be comfortable around women as a man, learn how to drop the "I'm not like all the other normies" mentality that you mentioned in other replies, even if you're not like them, you're probably overestimating how different you're anyway, that's how most people are and you're going to be surrounded by people like that your whole life anyway, so just accept it. Stop disqualifying yourself with premade assumptions (too conservative, too liberal, blah blah blah) from social situations, treat everything as an opportunity to get better. Eventually, everything will fall into place. You'll level up your social skills, your women friends will be your social proof that you're normal and will likely help you find someone to date. Good luck
ser
1mo ago
Oh man, almost felt like it was my writing, that's how similar your situation is to mine.
Any time I expressed grievances over a comment or behavior I perceived to be denigrating, my parents shielded themselves behind this
She would often treat 16/17 year old me as a marriage counselor after her argument du jour with my father
she sat me down to talk she asked for examples of what she’s done in my childhood that I found hurtful
This and so much more. To this day, I still feel guilt whenever they ask me if they were good parents because the answer is no, but they'll never understand why because to them they did everything right. They fed me, provided me roof over my head, gave me education, and steered me away from bad outcomes. Lack of nonmaterial parts of the relationship doesn't count to them.
Things will definitely get better for you as you get older and set some distance from them though. I personally gave up on trying to get them to understand, but it's okay. My advice - take advantage of whatever material help they offer even if they try holding it over your head, that's the only way they know how to show love and they will hold your childhood over your head anyway, so may as well just take it.
ser
1mo ago
You'll be fine, it will correct itself in the coming months. Just keep utilization low and don't open new cards. My credit score fluctuates by 60-80 points due to utilization all the time.
ser
1mo ago
I highly suggest zone 2 walking for your case. A 45-60 minute walk will do you more good than a gym session at this weight and given your aversion to discomfort, you're probably more likely to stick to a 1 hour walk (free, literally just step outside and move your feet) than a gym session (costs money, probably have to drive there, takes way longer than 1 hr, have to interact with people). Could probably leave the gym out until you lose 100lbs or so, just walk at fast enough pace where you're right on the edge of not being able to hold a conversation.
ser
1mo ago
Ideally, I imagine you and your (to be) wife have to be on the same page in terms of goals. And if you're so entirely off base from each other, it's probably not a good idea to get entangled legally with that person. If you're a hermit that wants to live in spartan conditions, while your wife longs for instagrammable lifestyle, it was never bound to work. But if you're a stingy nerd that has a wardrobe of 5 identical t shirts and doesn't like leaving the house, while your wife prefers a hike on the weekends and 2 international trips a year, it would definitely be possible to find middle ground (because her expectations are pretty reasonable and you can definitely afford it). And for the income gap, how do you plan to divide up your finances once married if that's such a concern for you? I'm not married myself, but I know some couples with disproportionate income gaps and the usual set up is that her money is her money and your money is collective money. And it makes sense when one person is making $700k and the other is making $40k. Your income gap wouldn't be as dramatic, but I imagine this informal arrangement would still hold up in some form - expect to pay more for things, even for stuff you wouldn't buy yourself if you were on your own.
ser
1mo ago
So what is exactly your main complaint here? Members of the upper class attending prestigious events, while not being true fans? Theater kids performing for the camera?
The other thing is it’s the blackification of celebration. Where you need to do things loud and visually to show how much it means to you. Yes I am now the old man who yells at clouds.
Half the arena for the Knicks game was suits/finance bros pretending expression of emotion was beneath them. You didn't see reels of them because it's fucking boring. Why is this even a complaint again? I remember the eccentric and extraverted kids always being in the spotlight starting from kindergarten. You wouldn't have written this post if everyone behaved like the boring suits. If anything, you're signal boosting the "black" way of celebration by posting this.
The other interesting sports related thing is the bifurcation of the ticket market for sporting events.
The K-shapifaction of economy is doing it's thing, but why are you acting that hasn't been this way since forever? I'm sure a gladiator event with top gladiator talent and with an emperor in attendance would attract a lot more heads than any other gladiator event in Ancient Rome too. Do you expect an even distribution in demand for lower tier sporting events/matchups?
ser
1mo ago
Slightly unusual yes, I happen to have really long and thin limbs. Don't think I look like a concentration camp survivor, but would definitely look better with extra 10-15lbs of muscle.
ser
2mo ago
Yes, but I think the concern over this is way too overblown. Average indices buyer will have an exposure of something like 0.35% to SpaceX. There's plenty of dogshit companies in the indices. If that's your main signal for predicting imminent financial crash, I think you're wrong.
ser
2mo ago
Around 3 months ago, I decided to lock in and lose some fat. Started at 22% body fat, goal was to get under 18% before the summer. Did a dexa scan few days ago - came in at 15.2%. Was a bit surprised, I was estimating low 17s-high 16s because I still got some abdominal fat and my abs are barely visible. At 6'3, I'm now officially victim weight at 155lbs. Even though I'm down 10lbs on paper (down 12.7lbs in fat, up 3lbs in lean mass), most of my upper body clothing fits tighter, which is nice. I'm really glad I went through this, learned a lot about nutrition and my body. I was eating 2000 calories, never missed a single day. While it was limiting, there wasn't a day where I felt like I was starving. However, by end of month 2 I did start feeling more tired and less motivated. Workouts would drain me hard, and I started to have to line up my carb intake with my workouts - I would just feel dead as soon as I stepped into the gym if I didn't. Workouts where I had some fast carbs beforehand vs workouts where I didn't were night and day - with carbs I was still able to push myself and continue (slow) progressive overload, while without them I was just barely holding on. And in last 2 weeks, even carb loading stopped being effective. By then, I gave up on progressive overload and just coasted through with 60-80% load.
A few interesting things: I somehow lost enough fat off my face for it to be noticeable even though I didn't have much fat there originally (or so I thought), makes me curious how I would look like at 12-14% body fat. I've always thought I had a mild case of gynecomastia on one of my titties but nope, it was just uneven fat distribution, which is now completely gone. The current trend of protein obsession in all foods is so clutch, makes hitting macros so much easier, while still letting yourself have some treats here and there.
Next goal is getting to 165lbs 15% body fat, clanker is telling me it will take 6 to 9 months. I already upped my calories to 2.3k/day, it's genuinely hard for me to consume this many carbs, I'm inhaling so much fruit daily and somehow still have some loose carbs leftover. Definitely an eye opener to how out of whack my macro intake was when I didn't track every meal like I do now.
ser
2mo ago
I'm not an enjoyer of these services either, but I imagine I'd be completely opposite of you. I can already talk about nerdy stuff I'm into with friends or on the internet, I don't have to talk about it with a woman I'm paying money to slobber on my balls. Would I prefer her to be smarter than a balloon just so that she can make an experience more smooth and enjoyable? Yes, but at the end of the day her main task is not that.
I imagine if you're a 7-8 figure SF tech guy, either a founder or a D+ level at a big well known tech company, you would definitely prefer paying more to a reputable escort that won't take sneak pics of you or brag to her friends about who she fucked yesterday though.
I use a LLM before every doctor's visit to get myself familiar with the issue so that I know what exactly to talk about to my doctor. Based on my experience, as long as it's not urgent care or a serious issue, an average (specialized) doctor's visit lasts about 7-10 minutes, where most of the time is you answering some questions for the nurse. Then the main doctor comes in for 2-3 minutes and that's it, here's your $200-400 bill. So, to get any real help, I need to come in with a clear understanding of what my issue is and what type of treatment I'm seeking, that way I can direct the conversation and get actual help. One time I was vindicated with my approach when I was about to be prescribed a drug with a common side effect of drying out meibomian glands (eyes), which would've definitely left me with permanent damage and lifelong pain had I not researched my issue, learned that this drug is a common solution to it and that this was it's main side effect beforehand. I had a laser eye correction surgery few months prior, and FDA has an advisory notice to not take this drug for at least 6 months before/after laser eye surgery. The doctor was dumbfounded when I told her about it, genuinely seemed like it was her first time hearing of this. A LLM didn't have access to my full medical history, so it didn't directly bring this up either, but I was able to connect the dots and research further once I learned that one of the side effects had to do with drying out your eyes. I think you could easily replace large chunk of all doctor visits with an LLM and get comparable, perhaps even better level of care. But I doubt it ever happens, healthcare is a big pie and beneficiaries will fight to keep it as is.
ser
2mo ago
What if he's not frontrunning America's decline, but the complete opposite? Venezuela takeover, pushing Mexico to deal with the cartels, salivating at Cuba. All these are signs of USA getting hands on in the region. After Iran war is done, I wouldn't be surprised to see a more formal 'empire expansion' down there, although I have no idea how exactly that would look like.
I have a friend that works Doordash/Uber eats in a big city as his main source of income. I don't know how much he makes, but it's enough to have a $1900/m apartment, a tesla on a loan, photography as a hobby, a non working girlfriend. He does it 4 times a week, full day morning to night shifts. Specifically targets wealthy high density areas, otherwise income pretty much halves due to less tips.
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