ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
No bio...
User ID: 1012
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
Within Japan, expatriate women from North America (US and Canada) or Europe are either: 1) Divorced 2) married to or the consort of a Japanese man. 1) Will be politically progressive 2) will be neutral, disinterested, or conservative
I have honestly been puzzled by every white woman I've met in Japan. They all seem a bit resentful; my cynical and uncharitable opinion is that they're experiencing for the first time what it's like to not be constantly pursued and indulged. The ones married to Japanese dudes also seemed a bit odd and not very satisfied, although I admit my sample size there is <5 so that might not be a fair generalization.
Guys with little hair but big bushy, Zeus-like beards will eventually annoy the shit out of me.
Overweight dudes with those bushy beards just ooze insecurity and usually act like they've got something to prove. Beards in general mark people as tryhard. Not all beards are bad though, I met a dude in his 50s who was small in stature but very lean. He had a medium length salt and pepper beard that made him look like some sort of frontiersman chad. I guess it works if you'd be equally confident clean shaven and don't seem like you're hiding behind the beard.
The allure of the smell of ramen shops is inversely related to the hour of day-- meaning in early morning the smell is revolting. Late night, enticing.
This goes for any restaurant that does agemono, too. Nightlife districts are putrid during the day. Reminds me of morning on Bourbon street, yuck.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
At what point do the rapid destabilizing demographics shifts and apparent deep corruption by foreign powers turn Canada into a national security problem for America? If things go south up north, are we going to have all those "new Canadians" hopping the border to the U.S. and bringing Canada's social ills with them? Is anyone in the U.S. govt thinking about this?
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
I've heard of it before, and if I had the chance I would definitely try it! I had fermented skate in Korea once. It had a very unique and pungent taste.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
It's a beautiful day in rural Kanto and I'm off work today and have had several Sakurao gin daisies, and so I regret to say that cannot write a coherent response worthy of your post.
But I will say that your points are well taken and I can't disagree with any of it... except that I swear I've seen tits in manga magazines marketed towards teenage boys. I know the more intentionally titillating stuff you're mentioning, and it wasn't that. But maybe I just mistook the market for the comic I was reading, I dunno.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
I didn't grow up with it and I love it. Then again I enjoy most fermentated foods I've tried, so I'm probably not normal in that regard.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
Thänk you.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
Re. 1 I think this actually contributes to the weirdness of said porn. If you can't show genitalia you have to get increasingly creative to titillate and shock.
Re. 2, is this really true? I'm not saying I doubt you, just that it's the sort of things that always seems to be brought up when the Japanese porn industry is mentioned but I have never seen/heard evidence for this. I don't doubt that organized crime could be part of some porn productions, but wouldn't a simpler explanation be that there is a large demand for porn actresses, it's a relatively easy way to quickly earn some money, and some subset of Japanese women simply don't have that many scruples around participating?
Re. 3, not wrong, but I'd almost deny that "sex" means the same thing here. You correctly point out that procreation is not the main goals. When people say "nobody is having sex" it typically means "nobody is having sex (and forming the emotional connections and relationships that typically precede and succeed said sex)." Visiting a prostitute and enjoying what is IMO essentially a more expensive form of masturbation. And spending a ton of money on an expensive masturbation habit rather than just trying to talk to girls and get in their pants seems pretty dysfunctional to me.
Re. 5, to play devil's advocate, compared to America, material that we would think of as "porn" or "adult" sure seems more available and ubiquitous here. There are adult establishments plainly visible in every Japanese city I've visited, most conbinis have a swimsuit/gravure magazine section right next to the kids' magazines, weekly manga magazines aimed at middle and high schoolers often have topless women in them, and the "adult" section in bookstores and DVD shops is often only demarcated by a flimsy noren curtain that obscures almost nothing (or better yet, just a line of tape on the ground that says 18禁止, lol). Is this an indicator that the average Japanese brain is more porn-soaked than the average American's? I can't say for sure but something seems to be going on.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
FWIW, some kids are just different. One of mine could probably be diagnosed with ADHD. Sweet and very intelligent, but very impulsive and hyperactive. He/she has a sibling 3 years younger who is far better behaved and has greater self-control. We could probably have a clean house and travel if it weren't for him/her tbh.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
Your argument is invalid:
- Gumbo
- Crawfish etouffee
- Muffaletta
- Nachitoches meat pies
- Grits and grillades
- Shrimp and grits
- Australian meat pies
- Sunday roast
- Fish and chips
- Bangers and mash
- Belgian waffles/stroopwafels
- Schnitzel
- Spatzel
- Sauerkraut
I could go on. I will concede that generally speaking, American Yankees (here meaning northeastern people of pallor) are indeed doing it wrong and their food should rightfully be shunned and mocked, except for maybe desserts and lobster. Also Old Bay sucks, fight me.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
If I knew either of these for sure, there must be something terribly wrong with me such that I cannot raise my kids with a properly formed conscience. It would be something so wrong that apparently I wouldn't be able to fix it with self-reflection or therapy. If that were the case, maybe I wouldn't have kids, I don't know. I would definitely exhaust all options trying to fix myself. I'm not sure I believe there's a situation where fixing myself would be impossible. Are you including stuff like severely mental disability or personality disorder here?
In any case, to answer your question, I'm (1) pretty sure most of my kids will have kids, and (2) I'm pretty sure most of them will be kind to me when I am old, so we're having a lot of kids.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
Do it ASAP. Your kids deserve a dad who's young and energetic, not a tired old man. Give them best years, don't fritter them all away on yourself.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
My oldest is 8 and my youngest was just born, so ours are little more spread out. I think you're probably in the toughest spot right now. It was most difficult when we had 6/3/0 -- needy 1st grader + potty training rebellious toddler + newborn is really hard because they all demand very different things from you (in our case, mental/emotional engagement, constant attention and discipline, and constant hands-on care and supervision, respectively). I used to say that we were worn out, mind body and soul, by the end of every day.
I guess when I say it's not "difficult" I don't mean that it's not demanding, but that it doesn't require a extreme IQ, physical conditioning, net worth, etc. to accomplish. It also benefits from tapping in to our deepest instincts -- I can easily justify skipping the gym or watching trash TV instead of praying or reading a book, but I don't think I'm capable of just ignoring our screaming newborn, or not feeding the older kids, or ignoring my kids for days on end so I can play my favorite PC game or something. I don't always want to do those thinga but there's some primal drive that makes me get off the couch and do them anyway that I (unfortunately) don't have when it comes to doing squats or ab wheel rollouts.
All that said, the lack of sleep, minimal social life, and all around lack of freedom certainly takes a toll. But (as I'm sure is the case with you) I truly cannot imagine anything more meaningful I could be doing with my life.
Hang in there for the next few years. If there's one bit of advice I could offer, it's to get your kids doing chores as early as possible. All of our kids could shower themselves by age 4, and they could wash their younger siblings by age 6. My two elementary school age kids put away all the clean dishes and clean up the living room nearly 100% of the time, and they fold about 80% of the clean laundry, and they automatically do all their after school chores (putting away books, backpacks, etc) and change clothes after coming home from school. After every meal they all clear the table together and wipe it down. Even my 3 year old is doing small chores here and there (mostly "put this thing over there" type stuff). Kids are capable of a lot more than is typically demanded of them these days. In the meantime, I'd spring for a maid service if you can afford it. Sadly our area doesn't have one, but I would have been willing to pay quite a bit for one a few year ago.
When you have 2 kids you can spoil them, but when you reach 4+ it becomes more like captaining a ship and its crew than what is commonly thought of as "parenting." There's just so much work to be done to keep everyone clean, clothed, and fed that two adults simply can't do it all for more than a year or two without totally burning out.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
New ammo. Could be that it's dirty, but the action moves quite smoothly, so I assumed it was something else. I guess I'll have to take it apart to check whether there's actual damage. Hopefully I'm smart enough to put it back together properly.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
Neat, I'll check that video out when I get my hands on it again. Thanks.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
Not that guy, but I have four, and I more or less agree.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
I have a 1920s era German Luger. I would say it's in "fair" condition. The last two times I took it to the range, it misfired or hangfired. Is it possible to find someone who can fix it without (1) charging insane prices or (2) damaging/heavily modifying it? Or should I just mount it as a display piece?
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
It's been several years for me and it still hurts. Ages were roughly the same. What hurts most several years on is that as I pass through the same gates in life that he did, I can't call him up and tell him "at last, I get it now" or ask him "how did you feel when you were standing at this juncture?" And I can't show him the man I've become. I'm sure he would have been terribly proud.
The best you can do is just treasure happiness while you have it and never take it for granted. Human existence is a long stream of suffering, drudgery, and petty indignity. Hug your mom and your kids when you see them. Let small stuff go. Take a moment each morning and evening to be grateful and give thanks. Happy times are so fleeting.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
As another practicing Catholic, there's no formal oath of allegiance unless you're assuming a clerical office.
I think you were just trying to get @sliders1234 to admit this point, but for other readers who may be unclear -- the allegation that Catholics have divided loyalties stem from the obedience Catholics have to obey the body of church teaching along with any refinements or developments of doctrine provided by the Magisterium (Pope's and bishops). So if I were to become president, I could not properly represent a constituency that favored something that ran counter to church teaching, since my loyalty to God and Church trumps my loyalty to the American state.
I think this has fallen out of favor since the majority of people now probably have an allegiance that trumps their allegiance to America (Evangelical Christianity, Progressivism, Global Socialism, etc).
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
Chitose, Tokyo? Go see the Asakusa area, maybe see sumo at Ryogoku if you time it right.
Chitose, Hokkaido? No idea, never been up there.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
Etiquette-wise? Do what other people are doing. Also, don't worry about looking retarded when eating, as a foreigner Japanese people will automatically assume you're retarded and there's often nothing you can do to convince them otherwise.
Recommendation-wise? This is all personal taste, but:
- Go for Korean BBQ over Japanese yakiniku. Japanese yakiniku is more expensive and less flavorful
- Small local chain kaitenzushi restaurants are often really good and pretty affordable. Avoid national chain kaitenzushi unless you just want something decent and dirt cheap.
- Go for hipster "gourmet" ramen places over greasy cheapo places. The latter are cheap but are often pretty meh unless you have a local friend who knows where the cheap AND good places are hidden.
- When you're outside of Tokyo, try whatever the local specialty or delicacy is, it's almost always delicious.
- Eat all the seafood. Eat at least once any sea creatures you've never eaten before. Kaisen-don are a decent way to get a lot of good sashimi at an affordable price.
- Try okonomiyaki, it's great
- Avoid most Chinese food here, most of it has been neutered to cater to the bland Japanese palate
- Drink nihonshu/sake, and especially local sake (jizake) outside of Tokyo
- Try the different kinds of shochu, they're interesting and unique.
- You can skip beer here, the macro brews are unremarkable and the craft beers are decent but terrible value for money compared to any western country
- Go to a really good soba place once
I think that's all I got for now.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
Looks like a decent itinerary. Keep in mind that Dec 29-Jan 3 is around Shogatsu so a lot of stuff will be closed/limited during those days. Double check that the stuff you want to do is accessible/open.
Also, don't do the Shibuya go carts, you'll just look like a tool and piss off everyone around you. If you want to do something quirky there are a million more interesting things to do even just right there in Shibuya. There are a billion cool an unique bars, live music venues, edgy boutique stores, and more. TBH you could probably just wander around Dogenzaka for an hour or two and have a great time.
Harajuku is a shell of its former self. It's choked with Chinese and American tourists, random Nigerian touts, and various (non-Japanese) Asian tourists badly LARPing what Harajuku fashion was 20 years ago. If you want to see young people wearing freaky and interesting fashion, go hang around Shibuya station or the rooftop of the nearby Miyashita park. Spend the second half of your Harajuku day in Shibuya or Shinjuku instead.
Mt Fuji is impressive and worth seeing. Good choice. Instead of driving, you might consider taking a fancy train with a beautiful view so you can chill and eat snacks and enjoy the ride. Driving in Japan is IME pretty dreary, slow, and tedious. Around Tokyo, lots of of highways routed through ugly/inconvenient areas with no view and often with large sound barriers so you can't see much. Don't know about the route to Narusawa specifically.
Never been to Sapporo but I've heard great things about it and Hokkaido in general.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
5mo ago
Is it your first trip? If so you'll probably end up doing Tokyo and Kyoto which is cool. Some general tips from a resident:
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In Tokyo, try to hit a single area per day. Tokyo is massive and if you have to traverse it each day you'll end up wasting a ton of time on public transport. If you only have 2 days there you could do east/west, or if you have >3 you could do east/central/west, etc.
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Stay at hotels with public baths, like Dormy Inn or the APA Resorts. These are really comfortable and affordable, and the baths are very clean and pleasant.
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Kyoto is small but it is absolutely packed with beautiful architecture, restaurants, temples, shrines, fascinating little boutique stores, and more. Plan to spend twice as many days there as you thought you needed.
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Check out the shrines and hot springs on the north edge of Kyoto. Mt Hiei is nearby and also quite beautiful.
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Always get a plastic bag from the convenience store when you buy stuff so you'll be able to keep your trash in your bag since there are no trash cans (sometimes convenience stores have trash cans though)
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Always have cash, preferable at least 10,000 yen, in your wallet. Lots of places are cash only.
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Hostels and capsule hotels have gotten so expensive lately that you can usually get a mid-range hotel room for only slightly more.
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Check what events are happening during the time you're coming. Tokyo (and many other places) are always holding festivals (traditional and modern) and other local events.
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Go to some museums. The average quality level of museums is really high here. Even small local city museums are usually pretty impressive IME.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
6mo ago
I'm sorry, but here at The Motte you need to write like everyone is reading. Your bigoted comment would have made me feel unwelcome and emotionally unsafe had my masters not seen fit to also make me a Zensunni master at peace with life. We need you to Do Better.
ActuallyATleilaxuGhola
Axolotl Tank Class of '21
7mo ago
Was it this one?
I think @George_E_Hale is right that they've cleaned or dumped stuff because in the morning they sometimes smell more like a dumpster than a ramen shop.
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