The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
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Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
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Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.
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Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.
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Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
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Just the opposite, I feel like everytime someone asks motte for dating advise they get a lot of good replies. Yours is ironically one of them. I think this place is filled with smart guys who took a while to adjust to dating norms and in the meanwhile got to observe and think hard about the fundamentals
I appreciate the compliment, however, OP wanted to know his chances. What I provide is, I hope, sterling dating advice accrued through both observation and bitter experience, but until he can convince me or himself he's assessing himself correctly, nobody knows! haha
These are all steps you can take to help yourself on the apps, but how much they'll help and how badly he needs it? I have no idea. And I don't really trust self-assessments, I did better than I expected myself, so it's not like people just underestimate their chances. You'll never know for sure until you put it out there and see how many matches you get and how much you like them, until then no amount of mere talking, without showing someone else your profile, pictures and personal information, can help. I understand very well why someone won't want to show that to online strangers, but without that, what else can I do but pray he takes my suggestions seriously?
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