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Wellness Wednesday for September 13, 2023

The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:

  • Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.

  • Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.

  • Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.

  • Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).

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Now in the workplace I do the same with my coworkers, "oh, this deal won't happen if I fuck this up", "what am I going to say to client if they call and ask where this is", "how upset is the MD going to look if I fail to complete this by tomorrow morning". In many cases they wouldn't even care that much, but I need to weave these narratives to be productive, essentially tricking myself into thinking my situation is a lot more desperate than it is.

Wow it's interesting to read such a similar internal monologue to my own. I've consistently spent my young adult/adult life basically internally shaming myself into working.

Luckily I'm slowly managing to get a healthier relationship to my emotions, but it's a hell of a process to go through. Seems like you're okay with it though I guess, so that's good?