site banner

Wellness Wednesday for August 16, 2023

The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:

  • Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.

  • Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.

  • Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.

  • Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).

4
Jump in the discussion.

No email address required.

I'm in my late 30s, so it probably wouldn't be great. That said, if I were single, I'd have no issue with dating any woman that had arrived at something that looks like full adulthood (e.g. lives on their own, has a respectable job, and so on). One way I often think about this is whether I would still find my wife appealing if I'd met her now, with her age the same as when we actually met, and I can't imagine that I would fail to do so. I actually think it's kind of weird that other people disagree and suspect that there's a performative aspect to the idea of being way too mature for a woman in her 20s.

Regarding your specific ages, I think I dated an 18-year old when I was 23. She was a flighty idiot and it didn't go all that well, but my impression is that she was still a flighty idiot at 28, so the age probably wasn't really the point.