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Notes -
I think it would help if you add more clear examples of double standards in your top level post, so we can argue on an object level basis.
As is, I struggle to think of any overarching statements to make.
I will give some examples that come to my mind when it comes to double standards in the care of children and of the intellectually disabled.
it is more socially acceptable to say "If you don't stop crying I am going to walk away and leave you here forever" to a child. The same is more frowned upon if said to a disabled person.
it is more socially acceptable to ignore a child's wishes to control the time when they eat, shower and go to bed, while for the disabled it is more often seen as a harmful disrespect to their autonomy.
it is more socially acceptable to ground a child for misbehaviour than it is to do the same to a disabled person.
It is (sometimes) more socially acceptable to allow an intellectually disabled person to engage in activities that are harmful to their health (smoking, opting out of a medical procedure) than it is for children.
I don't claim these things have the same purposes and effects in all cases, and no treatment is a one size fits all. So yes, very often the difference in treatment is reasonable and justified.
But I think people put the "ethical considerations for treating a child" and "ethical considerations for treating a disabled person" in two different boxes for no justified reason.
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