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Notes -
My advice is to focus on that, using techniques from CBT, REBT, or whatever to get out of the habit of rating yourself, even when you are rejected. I don't mean "high self-esteem". I mean not esteeming yourself one way or the other. (Rate your actions as good or bad, obviously.)
I'm assuming that you already live an interesting life. If not, make it more interesting. It's one of the easiest ways to be hotter. It's also the way to be truly "hard to get". If your life is interesting outside of romance and you don't have distorted thoughts about e.g. needing a romantic partner's approval to have self-esteem, then any worthwhile partner will consciously or subconsciously compete for your attention.
In terms of actual communication and seduction technique, I think that if you can get your motivation right (work out what you want, work out how much you are willing to sacrifice, accept that things will be imperfect, and overcome your fears of rejection) then these are actually relatively easy - just a matter of practice. I try not to think about it and focus on enjoying myself on dates; I have zero "game" in the strategic or tactical senses. I don't consciously use any techniques like mirroring or playing hard to get. It seems to work well: acting naturally probably makes me seem more confident that I am, and confidence is a turn-on for most non-predatory people.
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