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Notes -
Hah I have a ton of stories. From my experience on east coast US, Latin style dances are generally a bit more conservative and can have an element of snobbishness or elitism for new leads. A lot of competing for female attention.
Blues is the most left or woke and is harder to get into because it’s all freestyle. If you’re generally more traditional I’d recommend learning east or west coast swing, maybe trying both and going with your preference. West coast tends to have more modern music and younger folks though.
Best memories of dance are at the weekend exchanges/competitions. I’ve danced naked at a campground shower with beautiful women, stayed up until 8am dancing the whole time then getting breakfast, hooked up with women I had just met dancing that night, competed and won grants for hundreds of dollars to go to dance camps, it goes on and on. If you can find a group of close friends to travel with to these events I’d highly recommend it, easily some of the best times of my life.
That being said there’s also a ton of drama. I’d definitely avoid sleeping with too many people or dating around too much initially unless you know the person well and are serious about them. It can get real awkward and partner dance communities are somewhat small/insular unless you’re in a huge metro area.
I think the best part of dance for me though is the confidence it brings you. As a man, dancing regularly really changed the way I walk, carry myself, and interact with people, especially women. It helped me connect with my physical side which is something I find seriously lacking in modern society.
It kills me how woke the blues scenes became. I have many years of treasured memories, but my political positions stayed fixed while everyone else's moved, and it's hard to express oneself freely while also biting one's tongue all the time.
Yeah it's been pretty insane here. Big reason I don't do blues anymore. My local scene is still requiring N95 masks to go to any event...
Even after the Cochrane paper? Jeez.
I don’t think science is motivating them at this point.
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Competing for female attention in latin dance totally fits my model. Here's my completely uninformed stereotypes of open classes (I assume the competitive level acts as a filter), please correct or confirm.
Rock'n'roll/Ceroc/Lindyhop: High metabolism neurodivergents with that weird blend of woke politics and retro aesthetics.
Salsa/swing: Casual singles. Divorcees dancing with unmarried tech workers and suave manlets.
Kizomba: As above but the divorcees are older, hornier and outnumber the men who are scared off by the more direct sensuality.
Tango: Trad types who like rules and following them. Etiquettists.
Ballroom: More stable relationshippers, enjoy the glamour, inclined to take the activity seriously and with all the conflicts that follow.
Street: DDR variety Asians, retired b-boys, female actual-dance-students polishing their moves.
Not sneering, I could probably fit in with nearly all of them to some degree.
Given that the activity involves dancing all night how pervasive are drugs? What's the drinking culture like? I guess the need to both be coordinated and coordinate with another person puts a natural ceiling on that aspect.
Drugs are mainly just booze and some pot. Most people are sober though as far as I can tell, albeit I’m usually drunk. People don’t care as long as you’re a solid dancer, although smoking and smelling like cigs/pot is usually frowned upon.
These seem to check out for me. I’ll add that ballroom, blues and lindy tend to have an older crowd.
Extra question, and one that might prompt another story or two: What's the - ettiquette probably isn't the right word - concerning involuntary erections? Take a closed position dance style, add an attractive woman, lower the lights and top off with sustained synchronised rhythmic movement... You don't need to be a rocket scientist to predict where that can land.
And vice versa women. Natural physical responses don't discriminate.
Yeah... the general response is that people don't mention it but then don't talk to you or dance with you again hah. Luckily I've avoided that but I have heard stories of other guys.
Unfortunately you're screwed if you get an erection! I'd recommend just trying to not go into closed or something until more comfortable.
Agreed with not rushing into closed. After dancing for a few weeks, the downstairs head stops going "oh, someone's close to us? TIME FOR SEX" and learns to chill out.
It is pretty clear to the women and to the other dudes when a new guy shows up just to pull — he gives off vibes.
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Less of a problem than you might expect: even close-style dances tend not to have things that close down there.
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