We have no obligations on our selection of friends or romantic partners by any criteria. It is your freedom as a human being to make decisions regarding yourself and your relationships any way you want. You can choose to only befriend people wearing orange hats, or only people with only one arm, or only people whose name starts with the letter B, and that's your right. It would be silly, but you can do that and nobody has the right to force you to befriend people according to some other set of criteria.
Now, importantly, if you actively dislike people for weird criteria that might make you an asshole. That is, if you think people whose name starts with A or C-Z are inherently evil and that's the reason you won't befriend them then you're doing something wrong. If you befriend everyone but play favorites with your B friends and give them gifts while badmouthing your other friends then you're doing something wrong. But if you simply decide that you want to have a gathering of only B friends because it sounds like fun, that's entirely within your rights to do. It's stupid, but you're allowed to do stupid things. You should not drop people below neutral due to race or sex or other immutable characteristics. But you can choose not to elevate them above it.
This is especially true regarding romantic partners. Nobody has the right to force or compel or pressure you into dating someone you do not actively want to date.
Therefore, all premises and conclusions are false.
This website is a place for people who want to move past shady thinking and test their ideas in a
court of people who don't all share the same biases. Our goal is to
optimize for light, not heat; this is a group effort, and all commentators are asked to do their part.
The weekly Culture War threads host the most
controversial topics and are the most visible aspect of The Motte. However, many other topics are
appropriate here. We encourage people to post anything related to science, politics, or philosophy;
if in doubt, post!
Check out The Vault for an archive of old quality posts.
You are encouraged to crosspost these elsewhere.
Why are you called The Motte?
A motte is a stone keep on a raised earthwork common in early medieval fortifications. More pertinently,
it's an element in a rhetorical move called a "Motte-and-Bailey",
originally identified by
philosopher Nicholas Shackel. It describes the tendency in discourse for people to move from a controversial
but high value claim to a defensible but less exciting one upon any resistance to the former. He likens
this to the medieval fortification, where a desirable land (the bailey) is abandoned when in danger for
the more easily defended motte. In Shackel's words, "The Motte represents the defensible but undesired
propositions to which one retreats when hard pressed."
On The Motte, always attempt to remain inside your defensible territory, even if you are not being pressed.
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Notes -
We have no obligations on our selection of friends or romantic partners by any criteria. It is your freedom as a human being to make decisions regarding yourself and your relationships any way you want. You can choose to only befriend people wearing orange hats, or only people with only one arm, or only people whose name starts with the letter B, and that's your right. It would be silly, but you can do that and nobody has the right to force you to befriend people according to some other set of criteria.
Now, importantly, if you actively dislike people for weird criteria that might make you an asshole. That is, if you think people whose name starts with A or C-Z are inherently evil and that's the reason you won't befriend them then you're doing something wrong. If you befriend everyone but play favorites with your B friends and give them gifts while badmouthing your other friends then you're doing something wrong. But if you simply decide that you want to have a gathering of only B friends because it sounds like fun, that's entirely within your rights to do. It's stupid, but you're allowed to do stupid things. You should not drop people below neutral due to race or sex or other immutable characteristics. But you can choose not to elevate them above it.
This is especially true regarding romantic partners. Nobody has the right to force or compel or pressure you into dating someone you do not actively want to date.
Therefore, all premises and conclusions are false.
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