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In real life these values are on a continuum. My hypothesis (not thesis) is that the closer a society gets to accepting all three at once, the weaker it gets. It's not that they failed to invent writing; it's that they got conquered and absorbed, and their culture was taken out of the meme pool.
I don't know what you mean by "crock". The question here, though, is what is in need of an explanation. It's obvious why no previous society ever had the internet and remote control drones at the same time. It is not obvious why no society ever had (1) sex outside of marriage is morally acceptable, (2) homosexuality is morally acceptable, and (3) male and female sex roles ought to be respected equally. I would expect that if the combination were not toxic, a society would have embraced them. Many societies embraced (1) and (2), and I submit every society ought to embrace (3); so, an explanation is required as to why it never happened.
It didn't happen for the same reason the internet and drones never existed before. We didn't have the technology to enable it. Technology obviates previous needs and hierarchies. It used to be very important to be strong, not so much anymore, you used to need 7 kids to ensure your old age care, and that enough made it through to adulthood, not anymore.
There simply isn't the need to conform to those previous norms to survive and thrive. The state also takes care of a lot due to abundance of resources brought on by technological progress, hence all the single mothers etc...It isn't that they tried all three and disappeared without a trace (as you say you have zero proof of one succeeding or failing), it is that they couldn't have existed with the technology of the time.
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