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Wellness Wednesday for May 29, 2024

The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:

  • Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.

  • Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.

  • Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.

  • Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).

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Fearing judgment to some extent is good and healthy. If you behave poorly and show low character, people should judge you for it and you should change your ways. Any breakdown in that outcome is quite bad. On the flip side, you should reject incorrect judgments. The best way to do this it to build yourself into the kind of person that you want to be. Nonetheless, you should still be open to judgment and fear doing the things that would make people think worse of you. As with so many personality traits and emotions (anger, empathy, ambition) these drives must exist in tension and balance. People that either can't judge or fear no judgement usually suck.