stuckinbathroom
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User ID: 903
stuckinbathroom
8mo ago
It isn't a proper snowclone of the original, though I guess there's an alternate interpretation where the local squire's name was Seamus and the pregnant tenant girl went on to marry a Paddy
stuckinbathroom
8mo ago
When you're living in such a place, as the saying goes, they know you "seed, breed and generation" and "all belonging to you"
Paddy’s Seed and Breed (formerly Seamus’s)
stuckinbathroom
8mo ago
certain Southeast Asian countries (South Korea, Japan)
Anon, I …
stuckinbathroom
8mo ago
racial spoils system a la Singapore
Did you mean Malaysia? Singapore rather famously does not have racial preferences enshrined in the law, modulo a couple of ceremonial quirks such as Malay being the “national language”.
There are legal requirements that the slate of parliamentary candidates for each electoral district must be racially representative, and that public housing estates must have a minimum level of diversity among residents. But I would hardly call that a “spoils system”, as it doesn’t privilege any one race above others.
stuckinbathroom
9mo ago
I saw what happened in Atlanta, in Philadelphia, in Detroit.
What exactly did you see? And did you see whatever it was in person, with your own two eyes, in each of the 3 cities you mentioned?
If not, then how exactly did you see “what happened”, and have you considered that whatever you saw may have been selectively curated, edited or manipulated?
stuckinbathroom
10mo ago
I am pursuing a job, and indeed it takes up the bulk of my day (~80 hours a week or so). Unfortunately, this job, though financially extremely rewarding, is in a very male-dominated field and my coworkers, though amiable enough in the office, are mostly settled down and not the most social creatures. Hence my reliance on dating apps.
As for my hobbies, I’m a big fan of singing karaoke, playing board games and trivia. Yes, I’m aware that I am a bit of a walking stereotype. My Sunday (well, Saturday) nights are largely spent doing those things with friends. My friend group is reasonably gender-balanced compared to my workplace but there is, I feel, a cultural tendency within the group against asking out other members of the group; instead the vibe is that dating should be kept separate (and, it is implied, app-based) so as to avoid causing drama. In any case, I don’t think there are any currently-single women in the group.
Point well taken that I can and should get into shape. I do think that is the highest-marginal-return-to-attractiveness thing I could do right now, but I don’t see how that would meaningfully widen the top of the funnel. I suppose I might meet someone at the gym, but again, my read of the cultural milieu is that making passes at the gym is generally frowned upon (as always, rules 1 and 2 apply, etc. etc.). The thing is, I was already reasonably happy with my results on Hinge, so I don’t think lack of attractiveness is the biggest issue. My issue right now is that the pipeline has dried up.
stuckinbathroom
10mo ago
Appreciate the effortful response, but I was already fairly happy with my results on Hinge; just needed a bit more time, I think.
The last time I used Tinder in NYC was years ago and things may have changed in the interim. I’ll give it (and possibly other apps) another try, as things may have changed over time and across locales, as you say. Thanks for the suggestion!
stuckinbathroom
10mo ago
Completely unrelated to the matter at hand, but did reading “nullification fetish” trigger a mental image of John C. Calhoun dressed in black leather for anyone else?
stuckinbathroom
10mo ago
I am a late 20s/early 30s American man of South Asian descent, living and working in NYC. Several months ago my account was banned from the dating app Hinge. This has made a lot of people[citation needed] very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.
I can only speculate as to who got me banned and why. Suffice it to say, I don't think that I deserve this treatment, but the point is moot: as far as I know, there is no appeals process nor any other recourse available to me or anyone else in this situation.
Hinge was by far the best dating app that I had ever used in terms of the number and quality of matches of the type that I'm looking for (mid-late 20s highly-educated Asian-American women looking for a serious relationship/marriage), as well as the conversion rate from match to texting to date. Since my account was banned, I have been forced to use Coffee Meets Bagel, which has resulted in far fewer matches, conversations that go nowhere, and almost zero dates.
What should I do now?
Here is a smattering of ideas that I have considered:
Meet People IRL
Frankly this approach seems dead in the water in this day and age. The only reliable way to meet people in person anymore has been, in my experience, through academia. I had decent dating success in graduate school, though I think that might be more a statement about me/the social settings that I thrive and in: I know from experience that one thing a lot of women find attractive in men is being passionate about something, and passionately holding forth -- or better yet, leading a discussion -- about something. As a TA, I had plenty of opportunities to do just that.
Perhaps I could go for another master's degree, part time. It's even conceivable that my employer would pay for it, if I seIl it right. But that seems like a major investment of time and effort for very questionable benefit.
Use Different Apps
I'm open to recommendations for other dating apps that would be a good fit for someone with my demographics, type and relationship goals (vide supra).
As mentioned previously, I've found CMB to be pretty terrible. I suspect that I may be blacklisted from all Match Group apps (Tinder, Bumble, etc.) due to the Hinge ban, but I could give them a try. However, my limited experience with them has been that they are far worse than Hinge.
I've heard about The League and created a profile but have not put much effort into using it. I could be convinced to spend more time on it if someone can vouch for it.
There's a newfangled app called Saturday that the kids these days are using, but it seems to cater to a slightly younger clientele (early 20s-ish, primarily), and it's really not a dating-centric app; my read is that it's more for meetups/making friends.
Any other apps that I could use?
Circumvent the Ban
I'm reasonably tech-savvy I've done a bit of research on how to do a "hard reset". It sounds like in order to even have a fighting chance of pulling this off, I'd have to:
- Buy a new phone
- Create a new Apple ID/Google account
- Get a new phone number (and hope that whoever previously had that number did not get it banned from Hinge ...)
- Never connect the phone to my home WiFi (i.e. exclusively use mobile data) and disable precise location tracking
- Change my profile info (name, location, DOB, answers to text prompts)
- Use entirely new profile pics
- Pray that whoever got me banned doesn't see and report my profile again
I am willing to put in the time, effort, and money to make all of these things happen. My biggest concern is with item 6: I don't have that many good profile pics beyond the ones I put on my old profile. I've been playing around with some models for generating photos based on Stable Diffusion and I've managed to generate some fairly realistic pics of me, so that may be an option if worst comes to worst. Or I could hire a professional photographer to take some more photos of me.
As for item 7, it's been several months now so I think the odds are pretty slim that that person -- whoever she is -- sees me again, remembers me, and hates me enough to report me again after all this time.
Unfortunately, I was stupid enough to do the "recommended" facial verification on my old profile. I have no idea what kind of technology they use for that, nor how long they store the data for banned accounts, but that alone might mean I'm SOL. I wouldn't do it again if I made a new account, unless forced to, in which case I guess I could grow out my facial hair first to try and look different, or get a friend to scan his face instead.
Something Else Entirely
??? I'm open to any and all suggestions. Thanks for your time!
stuckinbathroom
10mo ago
He could’ve not side lined Atlas (if you read Atlas’s book, you’ll see that Trump seemed to agree with Atlas but lacked the courage to implement his messaging in full).
So instead of trying to build a coalition of like-minded scientific advisors in the administration, it sounds like Atlas just threw up his hands and refused to play ball. One might even say that Atlas shrugged 🤷♂️
stuckinbathroom
11mo ago
Always has been.
stuckinbathroom
11mo ago
To what extent is the elevated rate of autism among the offspring of such pairings due to the parents skewing older? Of course age at parenthood is highly correlated with rotatorhood, I would imagine, but I’ve never seen anyone try to tease out the magnitudes of each effect individually
stuckinbathroom
11mo ago
Sinhala gangs that run fentanyl in Mexico
I didn’t realize the Sri Lankan mafia had such a global presence! Do their sworn enemies hail from the state of Tamil-ipas?
stuckinbathroom
1yr ago
Adderall doesn’t just restore executive function to baseline
What exactly do you mean by this? That Adderall can boost executive function to superhuman (or super-non-enhanced-human) levels?
Coming right up. We also have Rent-free-erra Mist, Pepseethe, or — if you’d care for something a tad stronger — Yikes Hard Lemonade and our signature cocktail, Have Sex on the Beach
But when Cooper Alan sings:
12 pack of Busch Light, a can of Cope
Baby, that's all we need
Big fan of Cope Zero myself, but nothing beats a good, seething can of Cringeina
stuckinbathroom
1yr ago
Not like this … not like this
stuckinbathroom
1yr ago
and a devotee of Ebola’s esoteric spiritualist tradition
Explains why his writings make me want to vomit blood
stuckinbathroom
1yr ago
One wonders whether this is, in fact, the active ingredient. That is, the middle managers know that they don’t really add anything of value, hence they spend their days coming up with more and more byzantine regulations, while also maintaining a tacit understanding/distributed consensus of which rules really need to be followed to the letter and which can be safely ignored. Once the rot is sufficiently entrenched, the middle management class can kick back and relax, secure in the knowledge that they can credibly threaten what is effectively a (distributed?) work-to-rule strike, should anything threaten their overinflated status
stuckinbathroom
1yr ago
As an American, my vague impression was that the Canadian confederation of provinces had, if anything, even less centralization of power at the federal level than in the US. In particular, the absence of anything like the Interstate Commerce Clause means that Canadian provinces can and do get into trade wars with each other. And moreover my understanding was that the famed Canadian healthcare “system”—which is misunderstood by nearly all political commentators in the US—was in reality administered by each province separately, with the federal government’s role relegated to transferring money from one province to another.
Is my understanding correct? If so, could it be that Canadian federal politics sees no pushback against the Laurentian elite because (to steal a quote about academic politics) the stakes are so low?
stuckinbathroom
1yr ago
and she is willing to proverbially kill this sacred cow, something that is incredibly alluring to a sapiosexual
I’ve never been able to take the term sapiosexual entirely seriously, because in the Malay language, sapi means cow. Nominative Etymological determinism strikes again?
stuckinbathroom
1yr ago
Why should we assume that the simulation is run by Hawking radiation in particular? If indeed we are in a simulation, it could well be the case that the universe containing the "hardware" running the simulation has free energy from sources other than Hawking radiation.
In fact, there is no strong reason a priori to assume that the universe-containing-the-simulator is similar to our (supposedly simulated) universe in any way whatsoever, except for similarities that are required for a simulation to exist in the first place -- so, for example, we can safely assume that the universe-containing-the-simulator has a nonzero amount of free energy ... that is, unless the assumption that computation requires free energy is itself a requirement only in our (simulated?) universe, and not a universal multiversal truth!
stuckinbathroom
1yr ago
more like weasel on him, if you get my drift
stuckinbathroom
1yr ago
Musk: You are on this council, but we do not grant you the rank of janny
ADL: This is outrageous, it’s unfair!
But see also this deboonking
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